The other day I found a church with adoration. I had a little heart to heart with God about the future, our ministries, our relationships and friendships here in Mexico, my Dad's health, the unknown, my anxieties... you know just the small stuff. (And sometimes the small stuff, doesn't feel like small stuff... more like mountains.)
I began to be consoled that the Lord is
pleased that we are seeking Him, His relationship, and His direction, and He lead me to Luke 11:3, "Give us this day our daily bread." Just take one step, one day at a time. God reveals His plan slowly. The grace, the bread, is for that moment. Around
that time three American woman entered the church and one came up behind me, whispering in
my ear, "I like your shirt." I was wearing my red FMC shirt with a quote from Mr.
Frank, the founder of FMC. "Our God is a real God who does real things for real people in the real world." As a missionary, I too need
to be reminded of that reality at times. Sometimes God send us strangers to minister to us.
For the first time,
God began to put a message on my heart in Spanish. "Recuérdame mi
fidelidad. Remind me of my faithfulness, as the prophets of old often
did. Reminding me of my faithfulness and promises, is not an act of
doubting, but of faith. It is a faith that hopes." Throughout the Scriptures we find numerous heroes of the faith who turn to God and remind Him of His covenant. For example Moses pleads to God to remember His faithfulness and covenant with Abraham after the golden calf, otherwise the Egyptians would say that the Lord led out to the desert to die. (Exodus 32:11-14) It is important to go back to those treasure chest memories of those times where we seen God work, for prayers answered, for doors opened and closed, for those times where He has spoken so clearly through the Scriptures, through a friend, in prayer.
I
turned to a daily devotional that I often use in prayer. "Just
carry out my wishes and leave me to carry out yours... Every mountain of
difficulty shall be laid low, the rough places of poverty shall be made
smooth, and all who know you, shall know that I, your Lord, am the
Lord."
When we started blogging during our preparation to go into missions, we always wanted to make sure we kept it real as we share the highs and lows, the everyday miracles and the struggles of our hearts. That missions would be demystified. All for the greater glory of God and to give witness to His faithfulness and that no matter where you may be as your read our blog, that God can reach your heart with His grace in the current circumstance of your life.
As missionaries, we feel often inadequate in ministry situations. Especially when there is a language barrier. Sometimes we don't have the words to say, we don't understand the details of the particular situation and we feel that we are fumbling through the moment. We pray that people are sincere when they say, "thank you" and "that really helped." We thank people for inviting us to journey with them through their situation, to please come back, and we place our trust in God. The experience of wishing we could do more often follows as we are faced with our own limitations. Others affirm us and reiterate that God is using us, but we doubt. Being the minister and giver can blind us from God's grace in the moment.
Nieces and nephews visiting Dad
Until we have the opportunity to sit in the other chair. When the tables are turn, we become the receiver, the one who is comforted rather than the one who is comforting. A couple days after arriving in Allende on January 26, we learned that my Dad, John, was in the hospital. During Christmas he had slowed down. Considering his recovery from his broken back about a year ago and the cold Western New York weather, we thought that this may turnout to be the new normal. However shortly after heading back into missions, Dad began to lose sensation and mobility in his legs and he quickly declined. Following an alarming morning and a visit to the ER, doctors found a tumor on his spine at top of his surgery from last winter. Several tests later and after surgery to remove the compression around the spine, it was revealed that Dad has metastasized prostate cancer (CRPC to be specific). What does this mean for Dad and Mom? What does this mean for my sibling and their families? How does this affect us and missions? Feelings of guilt for being afar returned in a similar fashion to when Maria's mom struggled with breast cancer, or when my Dad was in the car accident.
In this dark and confusing places, God, reaches in with His love, warmth, and light. We have already received God's blessings through the generosity of Tonio and Mari Garza, community leaders, multiple times throughout this past year. Even though Tonio didn't have the words to comfort me in English, he is here. His presence, a hug, the compassionate look in his eyes, knowing that he is praying makes a huge difference. A couple weeks ago we had an hour of adoration and prayer in the chapel as a missionary community. I held back the tears as I made out bits and pieces of Tonio's prayer for my father in Spanish. It is my turn to lean on another, and to find God's grace and His mystical body in the friends and companions He has placed in my life. Despite what might be perceived as a deficiency due to language, Tonio's pastoral care is more than sufficient as a vehicle of God's grace.
Tio (Uncle) Tonio and Rebekah
The Prayer of St. Francis includes lines like, "Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console," and, "For it is in giving that we receive." Sometimes God's grace is in being the receiver. We need to lean on each other, upon the Body of Christ. I realize I don't have to be perfect; I don't have to be have the words, or know the language, or have the answers. It is not my ministry, it is God's. Perhaps it is through being ministered to, that I can learn this lesson that God's grace and greatness doesn't depend upon me even when He chooses to work through me.
Life continues since returning to Mexico. Here are some updates...
We spent two weeks searching for our new house and setting it up. Houses in Mexico come a little differently then what we are use to in the U.S. Literally houses come with nothing but bare walls, windows, exterior doors, and maybe an interior door. There were simple light fixtures, plugs and switches, but only one light bulb. There were no kitchen counters, cupboard, sink, or any appliances. The bathroom did have a tile bathtub, a sink and toilet, but there were no knobs on the bathtub. There was also no hot water heater or gas tank.
Kitchen/ living room
School room/ family room
Kids' bedroom
Master bedroom
Biggest bathtub we have ever had!
Patio
Andy helping the kids build their bunk beds
God has blessed us with a generous landlord who is putting in several home improvements and we have a generous missionary community who has helped us with appliances and custom bunk beds.
Paintings from our old home make it feel like home
Girls' bunk bed with storage
Boys' bunkbed
New kitchen counter
We have also been busy taking evening classes at the parish training us to be extraordinary ministers that are able to give communion to the home-bound ill and elderly and lead communion and liturgy of the word services in chapels. We had the opportunity to put the training into practice at an Ash Wednesday service. Maria rocked her reflection on the Lenten School of the Cross!
Last Friday we were graced to be received as a community by our local bishop, Bishop Alonso Gerardo Garza Treviño in Piedras Negras.
We arrived last weekend back in Guadalajara for four weeks of language school. Tonio and the Schmidt family are joining us, albeit, Tonio is here for four hours a day of intensive language courses in English! It is so exciting to think where God might use Tonio in ministry. We leave Guadalajara on March 17. Maria and the kids will then travel back to Allende with the Schmidts and Tonio. I plan on flying back to Buffalo for a week to help and visit Dad as he will need someone with him 24/7 and will probably begin chemo and radiation treatments around that time.
Please pray for my Dad, Mom, and the rest of my family.
We have been back stateside for a couple weeks. We are grateful to be able to visit and catch up with family and friends. While the falling the snow leads us to miss the warmer climate of Mexico, it pales in comparison to the warmth of friendship and family. Our hearts are torn as we remember our new friends down in Mexico and we see how much our nieces and nephews and our kid's friends have grown. We know we are following God's will and we are aware cost of being in the mission field for the year and the cost of discipleship.
Being back, even for this short bit, has shown us how universal our human needs are. Last week Maria had the opportunity to sit and visit with a friend who have been struggling with illness for over a year. We have been able to step into the journey with family friends as they navigate the beautiful and heart-wrenching adoption process with all its twists and turns and ups and downs. Yesterday Josh attended a funeral mass for a Canisius High School senior and the son of St. Gregory the Great parish family who tragically passed away last weekend. It doesn't matter if you are in Mexico or New York or the other side of the world, we experience the same anxiety, loss, doubts, grief, and loneliness. There is poverty all around the world... only occasionally does it come as a result of a lack of income and physical hunger. So often the poverty is spiritual and emotional. It is a poverty of the heart and of the soul, not the wallet. It is the same stories; the difference is just how comfortable your chair is.
Here we hear the cry, "O come... O come.... Emmanuel... that mourns in lonely exile here." It is the cry of the broken human heart longing to find comfort and solace. It is the groaning of a world in need of love and a savior. It is the yearning to know that we are not alone in this mess.
It is from this poverty of anxiety and loneliness that God hears our cries. Just as in the days of old, during the time of the Exodus, God responds. "And from their bondage their cry for help went up to God. God heard their moaning and God was mindful of his covenant... God saw his people, and God knew..." The story of Israel, our older brothers in the faith, is our story too. We share the same history and the same scriptures. This same story is shared with whole world, because it is a human story. God has heard our cries, and he knows in a deep and experiential way. This is Jesus, who wept at the death of his friend Lazarus, who had compassion over the crowds, who looked at the leper and the woman with a hemorrhage and was moved.
It is as the poor, in the solidarity with the poor, that God comes into the world. This is Jesus, who did not come down to live in a palace or as a emperor, but came as a child, to a poor family, in a poor manager. He came into our mess. His arrival was not made know to Caesar or Herod, but to shepherds by the angelic words, "Do not be afraid; for behold, I proclaim to you good news of great joy that will be for all the people." It the shepherds that first heard the good news for all people. How do we know that the Messiah and Lord is for all people? "And this will be a sign for you: you will find an infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger." (Luke 2)
And finally it is in the poor that Christ was found. This is the Christ-child, who was not born in the glorious Jerusalem, but forgotten Bethlehem. The chief priests and scribes instructed the magi that the newly born king was to be found in Bethlehem. "And you, Bethlehem, land of Judah, are by no means least among the rulers of Judah; since from you shall come a ruler, who is to shepherd my people Israel." (Matthew 2:6) For as Jesus quoted Psalm 118, "The stone that the builders rejected has become the cornerstone; by the Lord has this been done, and it is wonderful in our eyes."
During this Christmas season, where is Jesus coming into the mess in your life? Where is his manger in your heart? From where have you been calling out and inviting him in? And... Where are the poor in your life with whom the Christ-child might be found? To whom you may be called to share your love and gifts?
May the Lord pour forth his love and grace upon you during this Christmas season. May you encounter him in the stables and managers of your hearts and lives.
It is not everyday that you get to be pushed 30 miles
through the deserts of Northern Mexico.
For those of you who saw the picture posted on Facebook, here is the
story!
Every 180 days it is necessary to Americans to
return to the border to renew our tourist visas. If there is car imported with US plates, we
also have to renew the vehicle’s visa around the same time schedule. Failure to return the car to the border on
time can result in the person who brought it in from being blacklisted from
ever bringing a vehicle into Mexico again.
And the Mexican government has the technological means to track both
drivers and cars. Ol’ Blue is a 1997
blue suburban that came down in May as an extra vehicle for our team to use in
General Cepeda. As a missionary vehicle
she has had her fair share of miles and off-roading. We often joke that Mexico is the place where
FMC vehicles go to die. With Intake 2017
arriving during the first three weeks of November for the formation and
training of new FMC missionaries, we decided to drive Ol’ Blue up to the other
FMC post in Allende, Mexico for exportation and to do a quick border run for
supplies for the 35+ individuals that will be here for November. It was also a great excuse to visit our
missionary friends Tonio and Mari Garza and their family. (Click here to read about the first time we met the Garzas and entered Mexico back in May)
This past Monday Aron and I drove Ol' Blue while Maria and the other kids followed in our suburban ("The Beast"). It is about a five hour drive, and we didn't want to push Ol' Blue given her geriatric state. She has been getting AARP mailings from the DMV for years. As we began Aron and I prayed for safe travels and that God would set up divine appoints with anyone that we met along the way. We were about two thirds of the way when I heard the unfortunate squeaking sound of the serpentine belt. I began looking for a possible place to pull over when the sound suddenly stopped and I noticed the battery gauge crawl lower and lower. Physics determined our final stopping point as Ol' Blue died on the shoulder. Maria pulled ahead of me and met me at the hood as we began to consider our options. At this point we were closer to Tonio and Mari, but we were still a good hour and a half away. Of course we know no one in the area and were about thirty minutes from the closest substantially sized town or city. We sent Tonio a text (thank you Jesus for Google translate) and gave Ben Schumann, our community leader back in General a call. At the end of our conversation Ben led us in a quick prayer, asking for God's assistance and that He would send the right people. No more than sixty seconds after hanging up the phone, two gentlemen in uniforms came from behind Ol' Blue. At first I thought they were cops and my heart crawled into my throat as I saw the red and blue lights flashing on their truck. But, praise God, they were with Angeles Verdes (Green Angels). Basically, the Mexican equivalent to roadside assistance or AAA.
They introduced themselves as Juan and Javier. When they saw the engine, they asked where we were going and they offered to give us tow us to Sabinas, about thirty miles in the right direction. They told me that I needed to put Ol' Blue in neutral and that I needed to stay in the right lane. I should have realized that they didn't have a tow cable or chains and that they planed on pushing Ol' Blue the whole thirty miles. Seriously, this is an experience that everyone needs to have in Mexico! Getting pushed at 45-50 mph up and down desert hills and into a town is a guaranteed way to get the heart rate up and the palms sweaty.
When we arrived at the mechanic Juan and Javier asked if we were missionaries. I was wearing an FMC shirt. When we told them yes they were both really excited and began quoting scriptures. Quoting 2 Timothy 4, they explained how important it was to have missionaries that can preach and share the truth in a world of so many false teachings, empty promises, and materialism. We took a couple moments to thank them, to pray with them and for their families.
We then talked to the mechanic, Raul, he noticed that it wasn't just the serpentine belt that needed to be replaced but that the tension pulley and water pump were also blown. Nevertheless they could have it done in about two or three hours and that it would run about 2,500 pesos for parts and labor (only about $140 in USD! A water pump alone runs about $200 in the states.)
About thirty minutes after arriving Tonio showed up with a friend and we decided to leave Ol' Blue to get repaired at to return the next day to pick it up. That way we would avoid driving at night, seeing at best she would be ready around 6:30 pm.
That evening we gathered with the Garza family for a family night prayer. Tonio shared Acts 5: 27-32. In the passage Peter and the apostles are brought before the Jewish leaders and are corrected for continuing to teach and preach about Jesus. Peter responds by saying, "We must obey God rather than men." To be obedient to God, is to be in the palms of His hands. There is no better place. No matter what happens, whether something small and somewhat trivial like breaking down along the side of the road in the Mexican desert, or something truly tragic, we remain in the Him hands. We may never know why something happens, but God is still present with us. He sends His angels to journey with us. Sometimes the angels are colored green.
I feel asleep that aware of God's grace and peace. Late Tuesday afternoon, Maria and I drove back down to pick up Ol' Blue. We drove about 5 miles from the mechanic, when I began to wonder if the headlights were working properly. They just seemed dim and the dash wasn't as bright as it should have been. I pulled over to a gas station when the battery light came on and Ol' Blue died again. Why Lord do You like to prove how much we are in Your hands?
Maria was able to pull around and jump Ol' Blue with our suburban, but we were again not comfortable with trying to drive her or push her all the way back. By this time it was dark out. So we asked the gas station attendant if we could come back tomorrow to get Ol' Blue, and drove back to Tonio and Mari's without Blue... again.
On the way we began to think through our options. What if it is the alternator? What about the battery? How much more money should we be putting in to Ol' Blue before dumping her? Do we try to find a mechanic in Sabinas? Do we just tow her back ourselves? Do we jump her, drive her as far as we can, and then repeat as often as necessary? Tonio and I decided to go back the next morning and try to figure it out.
Wednesday morning I woke up anxious. God, how are we going to get this car back? What is it going to take? I just want to be done with it!! Tonio and I drove the 45 minutes back to Ol' Blue. Of course she started right away without a jump, but the battery gauge only went about a quarter of the way, not the halfway point where it normally should rest. So we let her run for a little bit to see if the charge changed. Slowly it began to dip, so Tonio went to find the closest shop. Praise God, it was literally right behind the gas station. The new mechanic took 30 seconds and identified the problem... simply a loose wire that ran from the battery to the alternator, a five minute fix. God has us in the palms of His hands. Third time is the charm, we were able to get Ol' Blue exported and settled.
Please pray for Intake 2017 as the begin their three week stay down here in Mexico. It is such a blessing getting to know the new FMC missionaries during this time of training!
We are beginning to make plans to come back to Ohio and Western NY to visit family and friends in December and January! We hope to see as many of you as possible.
STAY TUNED! We will be releasing a new video this week with an important announcement and update about our family's missionary work in 2018. (Here is a hint... we are not pregnant)
I am so sadden looking out into the world and seeing so many problems and tragedies and issues. Whether something on the larger scale that receives more media attention or smaller more "neighborhood" occurrences. There have been natural disasters like the earthquake in Mexico City and hurricanes in Texas, Florida, and Puerto Rico. There are the tragedies like the murders in Las Vegas. There are the deeply heartfelt convictions surrounding racial inequalities, supporting the U.S. military, and kneeling during the national anthem. These are just a few. There are many more examples of recent events, issues, and headlines that have popped up on my notifications and Facebook.
First and foremost, and I really want to emphasis this point... My heart and prayers go out to all those that have fallen victim, are suffering and grieving, and who are trying to put together their lives from any of these situations. The sudden loss of life and the suffering that results from natural disasters, and, I think even more so, from the hands of another human being is beyond words. My gratitude for the courageous men and women who have suffered and given the service of our country and for liberty is tremendous. Perhaps living out of the U.S. has given me an even deeper appreciation. My heart is heavy that a fellow human being is looked down upon and harassed due to the color of their skin.
And comes the question of what do we do about these things. How do we make it better? Do we open ports to a U.S. territory that is over $70 billion in debt to receive aid? For the safety of the general public, do we allow more conceal carry permits? Do we legislate stronger laws on gun control? To be honest... I don't know. And not to sound like a Debbie Downer, but we won't stop these things from happening. There will always be natural disasters. While we will make advances in mental health, we will never cure all mental illnesses, depression, anxiety, fear, etc. There will always be, at least on this side of eternity, prejudices, discrimination, violence, etc. Despite how well trained our law enforcement and just and firm our laws, all though a minority, there will always be those who disregard and break them. And occasionally even by those who wear the badge.
We should be striving to address and correct these tragedies and issues, but there is no magic wand, or pill, or simple solution to any of the world's problems and tragedies. I'm sorry, but there is not. The situations and the issues surrounding them are complex. There is never just a single thread, but a complex tapestry of a frail and damaged world. While ALL human beings are fundamentally good, for ALL are created in the image and likeness of God, we are broken, stained with original sin. I know it is cliché, but I have gotten so use to our fast food, Google, smartphone society, that sometimes I forget that 99% (made up figure) of real issues, problems, and tragedies of the world cannot be fixed like a drive thru or with a click on a screen.
This is not just an American reality. It can be found throughout the world. There is a young woman in her late teens with a year old daughter. For privacy's sake we will call her "Mary." For the past year we have been working with Mary trying to find ways to support her and her daughter, finically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. Unfortunately Mary's circumstances are not unique to the women of Mexico. Her boyfriend, the father of the child, cannot hold a steady job and is abusive. There is a roller coaster history of Mary leaving him and then returning. We have provided outs for her and have tried to help her become independent. It is an uphill battle, and one that Mary has to decide to choose for herself. We will continue to reach out to her and help her and love her. There is no magic wand. I cannot fix and change the situation with a quick swish and a puff of smoke.
The only solution is LOVE! It sounds so cliché! But it is true. I'm in no way talking about an emotion or some flighty idea or pie in the sky utopian. LOVE IS NOT A MAGIC WAND! Love takes work, sacrifice, and time. It involves truly listening to the other, striving for compassion. It strives to understand the depression, the loss, the grieving, the fear, the slavery that envelopes the emotions and the heart. It seeks out those trapped in mental illness, enslaved to poverty, and cast out onto the fridges of society. It praises those who have sacrificed much for society, and it stretches out its hand to those who have suffered much by society.
Love is not an easy fix and it costs much. Again, I risk sounding cliché, but look at the cross. The cross is not easy; it is not a magic wand. Christ poured Himself out totally and completely...
...for you...
...for me...
...for the whole world.
Love is not easy, but it is the solution. Peace won't come from our laws, or policies. It will only come through love. Can we say yes to this divine love for each of us individual? Do we have the courage to let that love change us and transform us? Knowing that we are unconditionally loved, are we willing to surrender and change those areas of our lives that hold us back from receiving more of that love? Are we willing to go out and show that love to others, aware that it will cost us?
In this love, I can place my hope.
This past Wednesday was the Feast of Saint Francis of Assisi. I cannot think of a more powerful prayer that captures the need for love to change our world.
Lord, make me an instrument of Your peace.
Where there is hatred, let me
sow love;
where there is injury, pardon;
where there is doubt, faith;
where there is despair, hope;
where there is darkness, light;
where
there is sadness, joy.
O, Divine Master,
grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to
console;
to be understood as to understand;
to be loved as to love;
For
it is in giving that we receive;
it is in pardoning that we are
pardoned;
it is in dying that we are born again to eternal life.
P.S.
The ideas and thoughts for this post have been bouncing around and coming together for the past week or so. It took me a while just to figure out a title for this post. I
was considering variety of options including a subtitle of "A missionary
perspective on recent tragedies and headlines and the social media." As
an FMC missionary, I'm careful regarding topics surrounding politics and as a rule I try to avoid it online and in social
media (even before I was a missionary). My goal here is not to engage
in politics. My attempt to thread a line through these issues and circumstances is
not to end up sitting on a fence, but hopefully, through God's grace,
transcend above them and to challenge, first foremost myself, to deeper conversion to
the Gospel and to Christ's love. If you are interested in talking more about recent events, I would love to do so via email, over the phone, or even better, face to face in the future. I am eager to have these conversations, but please do not seek a political dialogue on this blog page or through Facebook.
First of all, thank you for all your concerns and prayers
for the people of Mexico during last week’s earthquake.We are safe and did not feel the tremor at
all while at language school in Guadalajara (about 300 miles from Mexico
City).Our hearts and prayers continue
to go out to the people and the country that are so generously hosting us.
Language school is going great. Maria and I both get two hours of class time each morning with no more than two other students. We take turns getting an hour of private tutoring in the afternoon. The boys are in a class with just themselves for two hours a day. MJ and Naomi go to a Montessori school from 8:30 to 1:00. We have been learning a lot and enjoyed exploring the area and culture.
Studying with Dad.
Washing the dishes.
Street performers based of off indigenous traditions.
View from the hike into a canyon near Guadalajara.
Reason for the hike... volcanic hot springs!
We also got to reunite with a little of Buffalo when we went to visit Chris and Ann Marie Duquin and their children in Ajijic over the weekend! The town, and mountains, and lake felt like the Adirondacks with the occasional palm tree. We eventually did figure out the timer on the camera. With the local dogs trying to sniff the shutter, this was the best we got!
The Duquin and Gehl Families
Exploring the Streets of Ajijic.
Colors of the market
More colors
Speaking of markets... Jesus is a horrible economist!In this past weekend's gospel (Matthew 20:1-16) Jesus
shares a parable about a boss who goes to the main square and hires workers in
the morning, some more at noon, again some more in the afternoon, and finally
another group an hour before the end of the workday.He then pays them in the opposite order that
he employed them, but paying them all the same amount, a full day’s wage.The workers that worked the whole day, and
therefore were paid last, were upset feeling that it was unjust that they were
paid the same as those that worked only an hour.
A critic of more progressive economic
structures, perhaps like socialism, might suggest that the next day, people
would show up later in the square, hoping to work only a half day or less and
hoping to get the full day’s wage.Eventually all potential workers would show up only at the last hour, hoping
to get employed and get paid for a full day of work.Of course then business would slow down and
most likely reach a point where it was no longer sustainable to hire people
only for an hour and pay them for a full day.
Having lived in Mexico for the past several months and after exploring
various plazas and markets, my imagination creates new images of what
this scene and what the people must have looked like. The question comes to my mind, who were the people that
did not get hired till the last hour?When the boss asked them, “Why do you stand here idle all?” They simply
responded, “Because no one has hired us.”Why did they not get hired earlier in the day?Maybe they had some kind of handicap that
made them undesirable for hire.Perhaps
they were bound to a wheelchair or some other physical calamity, had an
addiction, or struggled with a mental illness. Their usefulness was in question to the point where they
were perceived as more of a hindrance to most potential employers.
Señor Juan
As we encounter these individuals, as we learn their names, their stories, and come to know them, and even consider them friends, I am forced to have a new perspective. The morning we were leaving General Cepeda for Guadalajara, I was taking garbage to the corner when I heard Señor Juan call to me asking for help. Of course Señor Juan, didn't know who I was. Seriously, he didn't know I was a missionary. He didn't know I was white or an American. He didn't know if I was a man or a woman, if I was an adult or a child. He couldn't... Señor Juan is blind. He needed to get to the Presidencia, the local town hall or municipal building, about 100 yards from the corner he was standing at. I figured out that either a family member or friend had dropped him off and for some reason did not take him the rest of the way. He was standing at the corner waiting for anyone to pass him so he could ask for help.
It took me a while to figure out what exactly he wanted, but eventually I figured it out, I took him by the hand and walked him the rest of the way. Of course this was September 16, the Mexican Independence Day, so everything was closed. After another fifteen minutes of communicating, I figured out that he didn't need a ride back to his house. Which is good, because I have no idea how a blind man would give me directions. "Turn here" and "Go past the next green house" don't really work. Fortunately he only needed a help to the Comedor. (A "restaurant" that provides free meals for the sick and elderly.) As we walked this time, I noticed his slow gate was partially due to his blindness, but also due to the poor condition of his shoes. I asked him how were his feet, he said good, but that his shoes were a little old. That was an understatement. I judged the rough size of his feet and told him that I may have a pair that would fit him. I was able to direct him to the short concrete wall to sit (see the above picture) while I went and grabbed the shoes. Images of feet washing flashed through my mind I unlaced his old shoes and revealed his dry and cracked sockless feet. Praise the Lord the shoes were a perfect fit. Señor Juan was so excited and proud to feel his new shoes and try them out as we walked to the Comedor.
Would I be willing to sacrifice and work a whole day, just to do enough work so that both Señor Juan and I could get a full day's wage? How could I say no? From an economic perspective, is it fair or just... no. Jesus' teachings on divine economics doesn't make sense from any business or economic stand point. Their utility is questionable for both capitalism and socialism. But for the Kingdom of God, for sake of the virtues of generosity, love of neighbor, and mercy, they are beyond reproach. Governments, social structures, economic systems perhaps can lead to a just and fair society, but they cannot, in themselves, change the heart, nor make a person generous or virtuous. This is the realm of conversion and morals. When I encounter another person, am I open to hearing their story? Am I willing to let the reality of that person change who I am, my outlook on life and the world, the decisions that I make, and increase my capacity to love?
The Kingdom of God is neither fair nor just. I don't deserve it. I can't earn it. In fact in my brokenness and weaknesses, I fall drastically short of God's love. But that is exactly the point... the love of God is a gift. His mercy... a gift. I just have to acknowledge how much I need it and accept it. And His love and mercy invites me to change my life so I can increase my capacity to receive more. The wages given to the workers that only labored for one hour received a gift that they didn't earn either. They only needed to accept it.
As Christians, we are called to be like Christ, we must then also ask the question, how can I be more generous and merciful? How can I be more like Christ? Who are the undesirables, the useless ones. They are the ones that no one sought to hire, the unseen and forgotten. Spiritually speaking, who are the ones bound to a wheelchair with some calamity... maybe an
addiction, or a mental illness. Maybe a former convict that has served his time
and despite his desire and ability to now be a meaningful member of society, is
scarred by an unjust reputation and stigma.Maybe a person that was a religious, racial, or social outcast. But I know this, Jesus would seek them out and hire them even for just the last hour of the day. What if Jesus desires to seek them out and hire them through me? Through you?
